That Terry

Grrrl Chillin

August 20, 2018May 16, 2021 Author - Terry D. Gibson ©

As I sit down to write this #MondayBlog today, I realize I am late. However, I won’t worry about that. I’m getting one in long before Tuesday, which makes me happy.

Speaking of joy, I feel good today. Why am I happy, you ask? Especially when:

There are 540 fires burning in my province and, even in Vancouver, the air quality is BC’s worst in history and the worst in the world.

I am stuck indoors in hot temperatures (no air con) because I don’t want to risk endangering my health any more than it already is.

I would love a long walk in fresh air so much, I could exclamation mark my dear readers to death.

I wish I was younger and stronger and I could help those in distress.

I’ve hurt my back again. Ouch.

Our PM is keen on killing us with more disturbed earth by drilling here–even as peoples’ homes are being burnt to rubble and others struggle to breathe.

My rent has taken a $140 jump for September. Food prices are thru the roof and nobody else seems to talk about it.

Darling Meeco, my beloved feline, is freaking out because I won’t let her out in that dangerous air.

I’m happy because:

I got my hair cut. It was past my shoulders for the first time since I was a little girl. The cooling effect is amazing.

I’ll be a fan whisperer tonight, which is fun. For anyone who didn’t see my tweet yesterday, this is it:

@Bookmark_Terry
“Right now, I am a fan whisperer. Nope. Not going crazy. My fan needs coaxing to get it spinning. I even hugged it, making sure to keep my perky bosoms out of its way (as Blanche Devereaux of #GoldenGirls would say). Aha! It works again! My hugs work miracles!”
10:19 PM – 19 Aug 2018

I feel hopeful. Except for my resources at the moment, I still feel as if I can change my life.

In fact, I do it every single day in ways I haven’t documented yet and that’s okay. Everything’s just fine.

I know in my heart that we are changing the world–through Rachel’s Thompson’s #sexabusechat on Tuesdays at 6 pm Pacific time, and #sayftychat, which I was invited to join this morning. I’m sure there are many chats and groups I don’t have knowledge of but will later.

Bit by bit, we move on and create new lives and realities for ourselves. I am never more certain of that than at this very moment.

Here’s to it, my friends! Never give up.

Signed, this
grrrl chilling

In Honour of My Friend Who Is In Stage Four – One of Her Favourite Poets

August 13, 2018March 19, 2020 Author

Fear

Fear of seeing a police car pull into the drive.
Fear of falling asleep at night.
Fear of not falling asleep.
Fear of the past rising up.
Fear of the present taking flight.
Fear of the telephone that rings in the dead of night.
Fear of electrical storms.
Fear of the cleaning woman who has a spot on her cheek!
Fear of dogs I’ve been told won’t bite.
Fear of anxiety!
Fear of having to identify the body of a dead friend.
Fear of running out of money.
Fear of having too much, though people will not believe this.
Fear of psychological profiles.
Fear of being late and fear of arriving before anyone else.
Fear of my children’s handwriting on envelopes.
Fear they’ll die before I do, and I’ll feel guilty.
Fear of having to live with my mother in her old age, and mine.
Fear of confusion.
Fear this day will end on an unhappy note.
Fear of waking up to find you gone.
Fear of not loving and fear of not loving enough.
Fear that what I love will prove lethal to those I love.
Fear of death.
Fear of living too long.
Fear of death.

I’ve said that.

Raymond Carver.